It's July. In North Carolina. I am miserable approximately 87 percent of the time. It has been 4,024 days since we had tolerable weather. It will be another three months until coolness prevails here.
I believe that anything over 82 degrees is just showing off, so once it gets to 90 and above I basically shut down and spend my days darting from one air-conditioned space to another.
But sometimes! Sometimes Brandon and I remember that we are from places that are not the surface of the sun and we manage to escape back to them.
One of Brandon's college friends got married over the 4th of July weekend in the Midwest, so we seized the opportunity to escape the hellfires of the South and turned it into a long weekend on the lake.
We boated. (IT WAS COLD ENOUGH TO WEAR SWEATSHIRTS AND FLEECES.)
Notice how we are all snuggled up and Adrienne and I are wearing long sleeves. IN JULY! Midwest is best, at least in terms of weather (though not really in the winter).
My dad has a strict boating rule that you must offer a jaunty wave to other boaters when you're out on the water. We had a boat when I was growing up and I do not recall this rule from childhood, so I think it's a recent addition that came after he and my stepmom bought their pontoon boat and officially became Lake People. Either way it's ingrained in me, so I kept offering my cheerful greeting to every boat that came near us. Mixed results, really.
I'm not sure what happened here but it seems safe to assume it didn't go well for me? We did not really make any new friends on the water, but whatever. Their loss! SORRY I AM JAUNTY AND FUN AND Y'ALL AREN'T.
I left the sweatshirt there, which is fine because when we landed in Charlotte it was literally 94 degrees with 6,000 percent humidity. Catch you later, Midwest. Send some nice weather my way.